Rising from stupor |
I am who I am. But I'm not sure if I am who I want to be at this point of my life. I've fallen, I've stumbled and I have no one to break my fall. Though I am still whole a part of my life has gone missing and I would just like to find my way back. |
Remember how I used to just lay in bed and wait for sleep to come? Well, I don’t do that anymore. I just wait for my body to shut down and then fall asleep instantly. That’s better than crying myself to sleep, right?
Sometimes I think I am addicted to pain. I am drawn to it.
I marvel at the emotions I feel when I am in pain.
Fascinated by the thoughts that take shape in my brain.
I am intrigued by my ability to withstand it.
To easily get bruises and scratches but still be able to endure it.
Physical pain that is.
But emotional pain? I can only hope for time to make me immune to it.
